Stephan's Monster Page 9

  “End what?”

  “Us!” Jayden snapped. “Stephan, we can’t keep doing this! I can’t keep doing this…” He seemed to suddenly deflate. “It’s time for you to let me go.”

  The man was pasty in appearance, his shoulders hunched. The look of defeat and his willingness to give up caused Stephan’s anger to flare.

  Snatching his hand away, he screamed, “No! Never!”

  “Stephan…” Jayden trailed off weakly.

  “I won’t! I can fix this! I know what to do now! So it’s going to be fine. You’re going to be fine. Everything is going to work out!”

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  Jayden grabbed hold of his hand again and, in the most soothing and gentle voice he’d ever heard the man use, said, “How could it possibly work out? I told you, I can’t stop.”

  “The Zaytari.”

  The man raised his eyebrows in question. “You’re going to turn me in?”

  “What? No! You’re going to join them!” Stephan screeched, outraged at the very thought.

  Jayden let out a short bark of disbelief. “Stephan, did you hit your head when you fell?” The man threaded his hand through Stephan’s hair. “Or have you just finally lost it?”

  Slapping Jayden’s hand away, he huffed. “Of course not! Wha—”

  “I’m pretty sure being a murderer has eliminated any possible chance I had at joining the Zaytari.”

  “Let me finish,” Stephan sang. “What we’re going to do is ask for a meeting with the head of one of the three Zaytari groups closest to us. A mind search is required of all applicants, so they will find out what you have done. However, before they do, I’ll talk with them.

  Considering the special circumstances, not to mention the crimes of your ‘victims,’ I believe it won’t be as big of a hurdle as you think. I have a few possible groups in mind. All have leaders old enough to understand the difficulties you’re facing and the need for guidance. I just know one of them will help you find a position. One that will allow you to pursue your, umm…urges.”

  “And what position is that?”

  “Executioner.”

  “What?”

  He supposed the man wouldn’t know. It wasn’t a position that was discussed much.

  “It’s the most violent position in the Zaytari. Their purpose is to punish and eliminate. Not that Zaytari enforcers don’t do so, as well, but the majority of the killing is done by the executioner. An

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  executioner’s identity is never revealed to the public, due to fear of retaliation by disgruntled relatives and so on.”

  Saying nothing, Jayden straightened his shoulders and leaned back in his chair. Stephan figured the man was thinking. As his face remained vacant, he wasn’t sure how Jayden was taking his idea.

  “What if it doesn’t work?”

  “I won’t let anything happen to you,” Stephan asserted with surety.

  Even if it did go south, he would do whatever it took to keep Jayden safe.

  “You do realize that when they find out what I’ve done, you’ll be exposed, as well.”

  Stephan sighed. “I know.” It was something he’d realized the minute he’d thought of the idea. But Stephan had already accepted the risks that came with his plan. As long as it helped Jayden, what happened to him didn’t matter.

  Jade’s gaze drifted off—he looked so lost. “I don’t understand you…”

  “What don’t you understand?”

  Their eyes met. Jayden peered intently as if he were trying to figure out a puzzle. “Why? Why would you risk so much for me? I just don’t get it.”

  It was a good question, even reasonable, but it was not one Stephan wanted to answer. Well, one he wasn’t sure he had the courage to answer.

  Stephan found it a bit frustrating that Jayden hadn’t realized why by now. Wasn’t it obvious? Did he really have to say it?

  It was probably a bit much of him to ask Jade to recognize a feeling he probably hadn’t experienced often or possibly at all in his life. Hell, Jade had issues understanding a lot of emotions—shame, remorse, pity, mercy, and most, if not all, of the softer emotions. It was completely unfair of Stephan to be mad about it.

  Ugh, he was such a coward, a selfish coward. He always expected so much of Jayden…it wasn’t right.

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  Stephan gulped—he could do this. His heart may be racing, his body trembling, not to mention Stephan felt as if he was about to pass out, and the room had also started to spin a little—that was a bit disconcerting—but he could do this.

  Oh God, was the room getting smaller?

  Jayden raised one of his eyebrows. “You okay? You’re even paler than before…” He stretched his hand out toward Stephan.

  Voice barely audible, Stephan confessed, “I love you.”

  The hand above him froze. Jayden’s shocked look earlier couldn’t even compare to how he looked now. The man was downright gaping at him. Stephan was almost positive that Jade had stopped breathing.

  He avoided Jayden’s eyes, his face radiating heat, a heat he felt all the way to the pointed tips of his ears.

  The reaction wasn’t very encouraging. At this point, Stephan would be extremely grateful if his stuffed animals avalanched down and suffocated him.

  Jayden’s voice was hoarse when he spoke. “Why…how could you?

  After what I’ve done. How could you?”

  Wringing his hands, Stephan somehow managed to stutter out a reply. “I-it’s not so-something I can easily ex-explain. I-I just d-do.”

  Jayden shot to his feet, his hand clenched, but his face was void of emotion. “Move over.”

  It was an odd request, but he did it anyway. Stuffed animals and pillows fell to the floor as Stephan pushed them aside to make room.

  Once there was a significant amount of space beside him, Jayden slid onto the bed and pulled Stephan into his arms.

  Stephan stared wide-eyed at Jayden’s covered chest. He stiffened, his pulse raced in his throat.

  Logically, he knew he was safe. Unfortunately, his body wasn’t listening to him. Stephan’s fears were bubbling up to the surface, and he had to fight to maintain control.

  An anguished cry slipped out at the realization that he couldn’t even handle being held by the man he loved. God, how fucked up was

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  that? He was just as broken as Jayden, except Stephan had been too arrogant to admit it.

  Heavy with despair at what he would never have, tears welled up in his eyes.

  It wasn’t fair—Stephan wanted to be with Jayden so badly. The anger building up inside him tasted so bitter. There was so much of it—anger at himself and at those who made him like this. The ball of hatred Stephan kept sealed away started to crack open.

  “I love you.”

  Stephan blinked, and his hatred let up on its attempts to break free.

  One of Jayden’s large hands gently tilted his face up.

  “Your eyes,” Jayden croaked.

  Shutting them, Stephan took a deep breath, forcing himself to gain control of his anger. When he opened his eyes again, Jayden gasped.

  The man caressed his face, his gaze searching. “How? They were as black as mine…how?”

  Stephan laughed bitterly. “Jayden, my anger can run just as hot as yours, as can my hatred. I just have better control over it.” Tears ran down his face, and he let out a sob. “I wish I could be with you…”

  * * * *

  Jayden stared on in horror as Stephan began to sob.

  In retrospect, pulling the man into his arms had been a bad idea.

  Jayden would fully admit that. Stephan couldn’t handle physical contact. Jayden knew this, so why the hell had he done it?

  Oh, that’s right—he was an idiot. His brain had completely malfunctioned when Stephan had said he loved him.

  What little heart he had left
had soared at the admission.

  Surprisingly, his monster hadn’t shown up. Jayden had felt something from him, though, a sense of happiness maybe. He seemed content to stay where he was—wherever that was…

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  Now, Stephan’s eyes changing, that had upset and worried them both.

  They were back to normal now—the beautiful lilac shone brightly with tears. It had been shocking seeing eyes like his own staring back at him. Well, ones that weren’t in the mirror…or his mind.

  Jayden had automatically thought it was his fault. That it hadn’t been was a relief. Not that he hadn’t had some part in it. In a way, the little man was crying because of him.

  In other words, it really was his fault. Perfect.

  Honestly, he would rather face the man’s anger than tears. Anger was an emotion Jayden was comfortable with.

  Stephan crying tended to fill him with panic. It made his chest seize up and his brain fog. Thinking rationally became almost impossible—not to mention Jayden tended to do something stupid.

  When Stephan began to wail, his whole body rocking, Jayden kissed him, proving just how stupid he could be when panicked.

  That soft press of lips succeeded in stopping the man’s cries.

  However, now Stephan was staring wide-eyed at him.

  What a genius he was. This was a perfect way to calm down a man who was terrified of intimacies—a man who, just moments ago, was panicking over being held. Good job, Jayden, good job, he thought sarcastically.

  Dammit, what the hell was wrong with him? Hah, there were too many things to list.

  Jayden pulled back and blurted, “I’m sorry!”

  To his surprise, Stephan wrapped his small arms around Jayden’s neck and pulled him down, then pressed their lips together once more.

  Stephan’s plush lips softly rubbed against his.

  Working on pure instinct, Jayden sucked on his bottom lip and deepened the kiss. The smell of Stephan’s arousal caused his prick to thicken.

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  The soft moans against his mouth encouraged him on. He slid his hand down to caress one of the man’s hard nipples through the silky black nightshirt he was wearing.

  Stephan gasped, allowing Jayden to slip his tongue inside.

  When the man’s soft tongue brushed against one of his fangs, Jayden groaned. Who knew his fangs were so sensitive?

  He stopped his hand on its downward slide to rub the line of flesh exposed from Stephan’s top riding up. Farther down, Jayden’s fingers brushed against frills and lace. Blinking in confusion, he broke away.

  Stephan stared at him, panting, his lips slightly swollen and red.

  He was flushed to his cute pointy ears.

  “What are you wearing, sweetheart?”

  Jayden hadn’t thought Stephan’s face could get redder, but apparently, he was wrong. The reaction made him even more curious as to what Stephan was hiding under his covers.

  He yanked them back, and stuffed animals flew everywhere.

  Stephan squealed and unsuccessfully tried to grab on to the blankets.

  His gaze zeroed in on the silky pink lace panties the man was wearing.

  Jayden licked his lips. Dear God, they were practically see-through. Wet with pre-cum, the material was tented, barely containing the man’s cock. Jayden could see the pink head peeking out. Thoughts of sucking on the bulge and tasting the sweet substance had his mouth watering.

  “Fuck…that’s hot,” Jayden rasped huskily.

  The idea that Stephan hid such things under his very conservative suits had Jayden’s cock spurting out a dollop of pre-cum.

  Stephan nibbled on his bottom lip. “Really?” he asked hesitantly.

  “You don’t think it’s…weird?”

  “No, definitely hot.” Jayden grinned devilishly and took Stephan’s lips again.

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  It wasn’t a long kiss. Soon he found himself sucking on the man’s neck. Stephan arched and moaned as Jayden began to rub his hard-on through the thin lace.

  Moving more firmly on top of him, Jayden scooted down and began to suck and gently drag his fangs across one of Stephan’s covered nipples.

  Jayden needed more—he needed to taste the skin hidden away. He found himself practically tearing Stephan’s shirt from his body.

  “Jade!” Stephan cried out.

  In his lust-filled mind, Jayden had forgotten something he never should have. The smell of fear that drifted up stopped him in his tracks. Stephan’s cries were ones of panic.

  He jerked away. “Shit, fuck, sorry.” God, he had acted like an animal.

  Jayden cradled Stephan against his chest, making sure to keep their lower bodies from touching. Not that his erection had remained in the wake of Stephan’s fear.

  Murmuring soothingly, Jayden rubbed his back, trying to calm him down. It took almost thirty minutes for the man to stop trembling.

  Once calmer, Stephan looked up at him with watery eyes. “I’m sorry,” he hiccuped.

  “You have nothing to feel sorry about. I knew better.”

  “I’m sorry.”

  “Hush, sweetheart. I’m just grateful for what you’ve given me.

  Being able to kiss and hold you, it’s something I’ve only dreamed of.

  As long as you’re mine, nothing else matters to me. If you wish for more, we can. But slowly, and only when you’re ready.”

  “What if…I’m never ready?”

  “I’m fine with that. Sex has never been a high priority for me. As for my sex drive…” He scratched his head. “I mean, I don’t mind having sex, but I can live without it.”

  Sniffling, he snuggled close. “Really?”

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  What Stephan was doing, it struck him how significant it was. He was seeking comfort from him. It was a level of trust that before now, Stephan had only given to Liam. Considering only minutes ago Jayden had frightened the man, it was a bit surprising.

  “Really. Stephan, when I said I loved you, I meant it.” After sighing heavily, Jayden declared, “So, if you want me to join the Zaytari, I will.” He paused and amended, “As long as you’re sure you won’t get hurt in the process.”

  “To be honest, Jayden, I never thought love would be an emotion you’d ever feel.” He wrinkled his nose. “I knew you cared, but I thought it was more in the way someone would care about a possession. It’s why I never said anything.” Stephan snorted. “And now that I’ve said that out loud, I fully realize how terrible that makes me. Sorry…”

  Jayden chuckled. “Oh, it shocked the hell out of me, too.

  However…I will warn you now that I’m going to be very possessive.

  I can’t guarantee the outcome if someone tries to take you away from me.”

  Stephan giggled. “Understood.” The man didn’t seem overly surprised by Jayden’s words. Then again, considering how long they had known each other, he was sure Stephan had heard him say worse.

  “As for my plan…whatever happens, I’ll be fine. Don’t worry.”

  Jayden wanted to believe him. Really, he did. Unfortunately, he was too much of a pessimist to believe it would actually work out.

  * * * *

  As Liam stared at the two snuggled together, the only thought in his head was that it was about damn time.

  He closed Stephan’s bedroom door, walked through the open one that led into the hallway, and closed it, as well, as he left.

  Watching the two skirt around each other for years had been frustrating.

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  Jayden, Liam could forgive. The kid had been through a lot. With how he viewed himself—not to mention the world—Liam doubted the boy thought anyone would be able to love him. He knew the feeling well. At times, accepting that something was unobtainable was easier than hoping for the seemingly impossible.

  Now Stephan—L
iam snorted—he should have noticed Jayden’s feelings. No doubt he’d been ignoring his own. Honestly, Liam had never realized how incredibly dense Stephan could be.

  Liam only hoped that the two would begin to heal in each other what had been damaged.

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  Chapter Twelve

  A few days later

  Sighing, Dante threw the case file on his desk. Boring—it was all so boring. Criminals today just seemed to lack the cunning, the intelligence, and the drive to try something inventive.

  What was so exciting about doing things the way everyone else did? Initiative, that’s what they lacked. They didn’t want to try harder than they had to—lazy bastards.

  How could they expect to get away with it if they didn’t even bother to put in any effort? Where was their sense of adventure?

  Sighing, he spun in his chair. His secretary popped her head into his office. Her eyebrows rose when she saw him.

  Oh, my! Dante could just feel her judging him from across the room.

  He stopped the spin of his chair and smiled innocently, asking,

  “Something wrong, Judith?”

  Rolling her eyes, she snorted, “You have a call from a Stephan Everwood. Line one.” With that, her head disappeared.

  His curiosity piqued—what could Mr. Everwood possibly be calling about? Dante grabbed the phone and pushed the button to connect. “Dante Kozen here. What can I do for you, Mr. Everwood?”

  “I have something I wish to discuss with you. Unfortunately, none of it can be said over the phone. If possible, I would like to meet with you at my home. The situation is rather urgent, so the sooner the better.”

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  Dante’s excitement built. What could it be, what could it be?

  Something dramatic for sure—or maybe just sensitive! Whatever, it had to be better than the cases on his desk right now.

  “How urgent?” Dante found it a struggle to remain still—one of his legs began to bounce. It had been way too long since something truly interesting had happened.